Is it wrong or sad or pathetic that when people ask me if I like my job, I cannot honestly answer yes? Well, I can HONESTLY say, I don't totally enjoy it. Maybe I would if I was single or if my kids were all grown up ..... but right now, not so much enjoying is happening. I can't completely figure out why. Maybe it is because I would rather ALWAYS be home with Jack or maybe it is cuz I have some pretty spoiled, unable to control themselves and their talking and their behavior students or maybe because teaching encompasses all my thoughts and time (yes even teaching part time) and completely drains me physically, emotionally, and mentally......Or maybe I would just rather sit home, be lazy, be a housewife and a homemaker. Yes. I think I would rather do that. They don't pay me enough to make the time put into this job worth it. And maybe I would like teaching better if I was like a p.e. teacher where I don't have so many papers and essays and tests to grade as I do being an English teacher. Being a teacher is TIME CONSUMING AND TIRING! Don't get me wrong....I don't HATE my job. There are great moments when I love it and things I love about it.....like that I get to teach WHATEVER I want HOWEVER I want and WHENEVER I want! That is awesome. The freedom at the school I work is great. And I love it when a student says something profound or brilliant or interesting or when they write an amazing poem or a super intellectual thought. Or when my ENTIRE class gets their poems accepted for publication. (TRUE STORY!) Those are great times, but I don't know if for me, right now in my life, they outweigh the not so great things. I AM TIRED! I just want to play with my Jack-Jack, but no, right now I need to write 2 finals by tomorrow, grade some other stuff and try to write nice comments about each student for the end of the semester. And one last thing....right now it kind of seems sad that I don't enjoy teaching too much after training to be a teacher in college for the last 5-6 years of my life. Is it bad that maybe I would rather go into sports administration or nursing now....Yeah, but like I wanna go back to school.....Anyway, I just needed to rant and rave a little and now I am going to try to entertain my son and write two finals at the same time. Wish me luck....
P.S. The English teacher in me would like to apologize for all of the run-on sentences and bad grammar and syntax in this post. The Complainer in me says, BITE ME! :)
2 comments:
You would NOT love your job more if you were single. :) You would hate it more realizing how much you wanted a hubby and kids and didn't have those either. ;)
And being a mommy and housewife is not lazy. :)
Clarificaion: I know being a mommy and housewife is not lazy.....I just want to be lazy sometimes along with doing all the many duties of a mommy and housewife!!! :)
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