My first REAL job

(Here I am with my official State of Montana Educator's License)

Today I guess I officially started my first REAL job that I have ever had in my life. At least the first profession I could proudly, and officially say "I am a...!" So with pride I will now say, when people say "What do you do?" "I AM A TEACHER!" (You don't so proudly say, "I am a waitress," which is really the only other job I have ever had, other than a basketball coach.) So its official. I have a job. I have real responsibilities. I have other lives and educations I am responsible for. I have a boss. I have colleagues. And I have all the nerves that come with having a first REAL job. Today we had teacher in-service before the students actually show up on Wednesday ready to have their minds molded. :) While driving there this morning, I nearly hyperventilated. The reality set in, and I was stinkin nervous. I am doing a little better now, and it was a good first day. I Really like the people I work with. However, I will probably be a nervous wreck Wednesday morning, even worse than today. Here are the things that scare me about this job:
1) This isn't just any old crazy public school. This is a private middle school with tiny little class sizes. Kids have to apply to get in, get accepted, and pay bukoo bucks to go here. There are very few teachers and very few students. In one of my classes I will have 6 or 7 students and my other class reached max capacity at 12. I am more intimidated by teaching just a few students than a much larger group. There are perks, such as less grading and more chances for one on one interaction and help. But for some reason a small group, with less chances for comments, is more scary for me. I don't know why.
2) I am teaching 7th grade English which I am REALLY excited about cuz English is my thang. The only scary thing about this is that apparently two of my students parent's are published authors. PRESSURE. And then I also teach 6th grade World Cultures. If any of you know me I am not so knowledgable in the cultures/geography area. So I will have to stay on my toes and ahead of the game in that class! I will be studying my little bum off to stay just ahead of the students. Also, I have a whole lot of freedom to teach what I want, how I want. It is wonderful, but almost TOO much freedom. A tiny bit more guidance would be useful for a first year teacher.
3) For some reason, this age level scares me. I don't know what to expect from them. Especially 6th grade boys. For some reason this age is terrifying with all the hormones, changing, growing up, etc. All the work I have done up until now has been in sophomore, junior, and senior English classes. Middle school age is a whole new cup of tea. Growing up, I used to say I wanted to teach middle school to help kids through this awkward phase....maybe I just need to try to get that mentality back.
4) The final reason is: I don't know how I will handle being away from Jack. And I don't know how he will handle a crazy new schedule and not being with his mommy 3 mornings a week. This job is ideal. It is only part-time. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings. Only 14-15 hours a week. The rest of the time I get to be a full time mom to Jack. But I still think this will be hard for me, Jack, and Chewie.

Anyway, the students come Wednesday. I hope this "official" teacher doesn't faint on the drive to school.